an incongruent photo

Last night, Ed asked me how the writing was going.

I had a ready answer. “It sucks donkey balls.”

(In case there’s any ambiguity there, it wasn’t a good writing day.)

“I’m reconsidering my career options, perhaps barista, or monster truck mechanic.” The first wasn’t really out of left field – we’ve talked about opening up a coffee shop, a dream space, the kind of community place we’d want to go.

The latter? Well, he was intrigued.

Turns out I’m not the only one. My sister has also considered the monster truck mechanic career path. I didn’t ask, but I wonder if that option seemed attractive¬†after a day of unrelenting failure at a chosen task.

(Or, you know, maybe she just likes loud trucks. TRUCK-A-SAURUS!)

Either way, her compassionate reply made me laugh. “Donkey balls are quite furry, surprisingly large, and often filthy! I hear you, sister.”

Precisely. Just so.

It’s like being six years old, and having the detailed image of a magnificent flying dinosaur in your head and then drawing what looks exactly like the bugsplat from your dad’s windshield on your paper.

It sucks donkey balls.

I’m hoping for a better day tomorrow.


  • We could be a team!!! I dream of being a monster truck driver.
    I could even be part of the barista dream—I could do quality control on coffee drinks.

    • I bet your report cards always said, “Kim is a true team player.”

      So glad to share the efforts and the dreaming with you. You might have to arm wrestle Ed for the driver’s seat though.

  • TRUCK-A-SAURUS! Ahaha.

    Now as someone who only just found your site (via Finslippy), allow me to tell me what’s wrong with you…

    Joking aside, I feel that you are limiting your definition of success to too narrow a margin if you don’t think this hilarious–if short–piece offers a successful day of writing. And a witty metaphor to boot! Keep writing, sister, you’ve got it.

    • Justine, thank you so much for visiting scatterbeams.

      It’s wonderful when people who love me tell me I’ve got something – I trust them and I believe them. Their opinions matter. And it is also something especially shiny when someone who has no horse in this race comes along and calls me out (in a good way!) on my collections of words. Thank you for this lovely treat.

      (Disclosure: TRUCK-A-SAURUS, which requires all caps, came from my sister. Come to think of it, so did donkey balls. My sister has highly creative and widely admired cursing skills. I borrow extensively.)

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